NEW 'Merica Energy Drink
by: Merica Labz
-Tastes Like Patriotism- AKA: Strawberry Kiwi
16oz Aluminum Can
Ever been in a courtroom? Of course you have, you degenerate. See the statue of that woman, blindfolded, holding some scales? That's Lady Justice, holding the scales of justice and balancing them between support and opposition in the administration of justice.
See our Lady Justice? She's peeking. Why? Because the scales of energy drinks in our great land have been tipped in the direction of garbage - throwing the balance off between great taste and value in the administration of killer energy drinks. Well, no more. 'Merica Energy's Justice Flavor has arrived to permanently reset the scale, keeping one eye open to ensure our nation never backslides into energy drink tyranny. Now, what does all that jazz taste like? No idea. Kidding. It taste like kiwi strawberry.
- Zero calorie
- No artificial colors
- 200mg Caffeine
- Non-proprietary blend
High cost of shipping,
& High incidence of shipping damage in case packs, we can only offer this item as individual can sales price as we individually wrap each can in secure wrapping.
*CRV & Taxes are Included In Price
July 4th, 1776. June 6th, 1944. May 28th, 2018. The founding of our Nation. D-Day. The launch of ‘Merica Energy. Three dates that are forever etched into the granite of our nation’s history as dates that make us ‘Merican.
The founders of ‘Merica Energy have traveled from the rolling prairies of Montana to the Appalachians to find the best flavors that money can buy – and many money can’t. (We must never speak of the horrors of their sacrifice.) They embarked on this great quest in order that May 28th, ‘Merica Launch Day, might be the day that this great nation is finally delivered the flavors of patriotism it so desperately needs and deserves.
In these trying times, nothing will unite this nation like a lightly-caffeinated, zero calorie beverage made with love, care, no artificial colors, a non-proprietary blend, and most importantly, the ‘Merican Way. It doesn’t matter if you’re white, green, or purple – because we have flavors for all of those. The critical thing is that you, friend, are ‘Merican. And we are ‘Merica Energy.
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